Resilience and happiness are linked

Resilience and Happiness discussed on Never Say Impossible Radio

Resilience is an art

: Resilience and happiness go together

Resilience is a natural characteristic of mankind. As human beings we are the most resilient and evolved species on this planet. Our brains are constantly growing and becoming more efficient. Generation, after generation has become increasingly resilient and intelligent . Our brains are able to absorb more detailed information. Babies born today are innately able to adapt to technology at a much faster rate than their parents and can run rings around their grandparents. It is really quite amazing.

You are probably wondering what resilience has to do with our larger more efficient brain’s, which have grown dramatically in size and weight from our ancestors brains. The point I am making is that we are naturally a resilient species. We are able to survive and overcome devastating circumstances in our lives. Miraculously those among us who have suffered the most, exhibit amazing resilient behavior. Remember hurricane Katrina and the devastation that it caused in New Orleans? At the time of that horrific tragedy, I am sure that Katrina victims felt their lives would never recover. How about the devastation experienced by the families of 9/11 victims? Here too I believe that many felt they could never recover from their losses. I could go on and on and talk about wars, personal tragedies caused by death and illness where people’s lives were permanently altered. However, over and over again people have been able to heal, and go on with their lives and in many cases quite successfully.

Humans are always on the perpetual search for happiness and looking for fulfillment in their lives. It has been that way since the beginning of time and it transcends any differences that exist between male and female, ethnicities, religions, and political affiliations. Everyone wants to be happy. It is the quest for happiness that feeds the resilience that we see in society and their ability to recover from tragedy.

Is resilience a natural reaction to pain?

Sadness robs you of the desire to live and resilience slowly dies. When we hear that a public figure that we have grown to know and love has passed on by their choice, we are shocked and saddened. We wonder how they could feel so much pain that they would choose to end their own life? We also know that severe and acute emotional pain does not last forever. I am not standing in judgment of those who have chosen to take their own life because I too have been in the black hole of despair. It is a hole so dark and so deep that it is difficult to believe there is an escape route. The darkness engulfs the spirit and the victim feels they will never heal and happiness will not return to fill their days with sunshine and joy. That is the horror of depression.

It is possible to get rid of the black hole of emptiness by igniting your resilience. Inevitably acute depression when treated fades and is replaced by a more comfortable state of mind. In many cases, time is all it takes to heal the spirit without the necessity of medication or medical intervention. There are many methods that one can use to fight depression and help a person regain the desire to enjoy life. I know this to be a fact because I have been taught these methods and have resorted to using them repeatedly in my life. On a personal note I have had a lot of adversity to overcome. However, I know for sure that it is possible to control the pain of depression and replace it with happiness. It is such a simple concept that I often wonder why so many people are in such misery for years. I see it in their eyes and in the expressions on their face. Living in the state of ” happiness ” is a choice we make. Think about it for moment. Because of our nature to be resilient, each and every morning we are faced with the opportunity to dwell on our losses and disappointments or to move forward with the knowledge that a new day can bring a new opportunity to heal and to feel good again.

There are six tools that work consistently to help heal the spirit. May I share a story with you? I worked as an apprentice art teacher one summer for the national program called VSA Arts. A wonderful program that offers training in both the visual and performing arts for people with disabilities. There were many students in the class with various degrees of challenges. One lovely young woman was very withdrawn and unwilling to participate in the activities. I learned that she was forced to join by a relative. She would sit solemnly through the class. Initially I had a great deal of difficulty interacting with her. I would not give up, I knew I could reach her. She was obviously extremely depressed. When I finally got her to pick up a paintbrush she created a dark, muddy, depressing painting. It took a few sessions before I got her to open up. Suddenly she seemed to emerge from that dark hole of hopelessness, and she actually seemed to enjoy creating something new. The following week she was smiling and laughing as she continued to build her piece of art. It was a heartwarming experience to see her spread her wings and flutter around like a butterfly. She remained high-spirited through the entire session, which was a total of eight weeks. She had quite a heartbreaking story and at the end of the class she gave me a hug as she smiled and pranced out of the room. That is an example of the magnificent ability to heal. I prayed that she would not regress and continue to move forward in her life.

There is nothing secret about the tools I use and I share them openly with anyone willing to tap into their natural resilience

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Tool one-Explore your Creativity. Creativity of any kind works as a method of diverting your focus from your pain to what you wish to gain. It does not matter what it is you choose to create. I will go so far as to say that it starts with a single thought or idea.
Tool two- Passion- Fall in love with something that interests you. There is no room for mediocrity when you were crawling out of the black hole of depression. Apathy about your action will create a lack of desire.
Tool three-Perseverance. The only way to get unstuck is to start moving forward one small step at a time. It does not matter if your initial action is small as along as it is an action.
Tool four- Acceptance- Try to accept what you cannot change, but find the courage to change what makes you unhappy. Being passive about your unhappiness closes the door to change. Change involves courage. Positive change is what can turn your sadness into happiness.
Tool five-Gratitude. I also believe that gratitude is the most important tool of all. If you can find something in your life to be grateful for you have won half the battle. If you divert your focus from what you do not have and focus on what you do have in your life, the magic will begin.

By using these tools you will have begun the process of tapping into your resilience. Happiness is your birthright and your resilience will help you to overcome the worst of circumstances. Remember-“This to shall pass”.

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